Letting go...

Okay, this week has been a bit rough emotionally and it's bound to get worse in a couple of weeks. The thought of our youngest, our baby boy, going off to Preschool is hard to accept at times. I can still see myself standing in front of a mirror, just holding his tiny body, cherishing that sight because I knew it was the last time he would be that size. I should be glad that he has grown up to be a happy, healthy, fun-loving young man, but doggone it - when did that all happen???!!! He is so loving and caring and absolutely will not let me leave for work in the mornings until he has had his hug and kiss, and the ones I get in return are the sweetest ever. I know he will absolutely thrive in school and I don't want to keep him from reaching his potential and even exceeding it. He is such a smart boy, so curious to discover how things work if it has moving parts. He is also so in tune to when things are not going right. For example, at daycare, there are a couple of boys near his age who keep calling him names and picking on him. He lets it roll off his back, but he tells me later that it hurts his feelings. He's not a confrontational person, but he does tell these boys that what they say is not true. We have notified the staff at the daycare, and they are keeping a closer eye out for these boys' behaviors. What gets me is that these boys do it as soon as he walks in the door. My husband has had enough of it and called the boys out right there on the spot. The boys are smaller (but older) than our son, so I wonder why they think they can bully him? Maybe because they know he won't fight back physically? Who knows...

On the opposite side of the spectrum, our oldest is going in to 3rd grade and we're trying to keep her head level as far as growing up too fast. She's a 1-2 years younger than her classmates, but it's natural for her to want to do everything that they do. She is mature for her age, so I'll give her that. But it has occured to me that in 10 years she'll graduate from high school and could go off to college... who is ever prepared for that?? She is so smart, but peer pressure gets to her and she doesn't want to try to work harder. She's always on the honor roll and does GT classes as well as advanced math, but she doesn't like to feel singled out (she was one of 4 in her class last year, so she's not alone!) for fear of embarrassment and not fitting in. She is one I will have to watch like a hawk that she doesn't try to grow up too fast. I make a point ot give her hugs and kisses every day and tell her that I love her for who she is and I also express my appreciation for the hard work she does everyday in taking care of her brother and sister in the mornings. She makes sure they get their breakfast and have a movie they can all agree to watch, or other times she gets out art supplies and draws the most beautiful pictures for us. She's been able to get the other two to not fight and to play quietly in the mornings until Daddy can get up and fix them something good to eat. She is amazing!

Now our middle child, she was an enigma to me last school year. She has really blossomed this summer and I hope she continues to bloom this year. She would really like to be in the same class as her best friend since she is they type to only have 1 or 2 good friends, but there are no guarantees. It's good for her to meet other people and get to know them. She, too, makes straight A's and I'm sure will be invited to join GT classes. I am so glad they give 2nd graders the opportunity. She is getting so tall, too. Though she, too, is 1-2 years younger than her classmates, she's taller than many of them. I can see her growing to 5'10" in the longrun. I make sure to give her lots of hugs and kisses, too, because she is a cuddly girl.

I want to always know what it feels like to hold our children close and what their hair smells and feels like. Their skin is so soft, too. Their laughter is contagious! I suppose all the reports in the news about missing, abducted, or murdered children has me thinking that life is short and we need to make the most out of every moment we have with each other.

Old friendships renewed

It has been an interesting couple of weeks in Cyberspace. Our class president sent out emails, inviting us all to join Facebook in order to get together and see what everyone has been up to these past 17 years. 17 years???? That sounds like a lifetime ago! But, it has been fun catching up with everyone again, seeing what they are doing now and where they live. The classmates I thought would stick around are the ones who moved to other states, and the ones I figured would disappear after graduation, are still in the area. I have been enjoying looking through everyone's photo albums that they have posted with family pictures. Many of them have not changed a bit. They still look 18 years old - which is meant as a compliment, by the way. I would recognize them in an instant if we happen to cross paths one day. Others, I would not have known if I had seen them on a daily basis at the local Wal-Mart. I have even apologized to some just in case I have passed them by without saying "Hello." Another fun part of this "cyberreunion" is finding out who had a crush on whom, who does what type of job for a living, and how many kids they have or don't have.

Well, I would love to add more to this, but my hands are tired from typing. As time passes and more events come along, I'll post some more. Until then, enjoy this beautiful day! Go outside and breathe some fresh air and be thankful you're alive to enjoy it!

This is your life.

Have any of you ever watched the show, "This Is Your Life!" or heard the phrase "What will your dash say?", referring to the dash between the dates on your headstone at your grave? I've begun pondering that just now. I mean, I'm so laid back that I really don't care what people think of me, but I do want to leave some sort of legacy that my children can be proud to tell others about. Am I a good mom? Do I take care of the kids the way they need? Yeah, for the most part I think I'm doing okay at that. Am I a good wife? I hope so! Hubby tells me daily what a "good wifey" I am and how much he loves me.

So, that leaves other people. What have I done that is a benefit to others? I give to church, CBN, pay for mission trips (if one of us can't go, then we contribute toward someone else's expense), but that all involves money. What about non-monetary gifts? I guess gardening and sharing the produce would count. I love getting my hands dirty, so it almost doesn't count because I enjoy it so much! I find joy in giving away our kids' outgrown clothes to other kids who need them. I have a large box or two ready for Mountain Mission School as we speak.

But am I really making a difference? When have I ever offered to pick up the tab at a restaurant for someone I don't even know? When is the last time I made a dinner for someone and took it to their home? What about offering to watch another couple's kids so that they can go out on a date? When I really think about it, I tend to do the asking of others, mainly my parents, to watch our kids for certain events, but haven't bothered offering that service to anyone lately. When is the last time I returned a phone call to a friend in Indy? She called a few weeks ago, and I feel like I don't have time to talk; I'm busy, I'm gone, I'm this, I'm that. All she wants is a listening ear and a sounding board. Is that so difficult???

So, what will my dash say? What will be my legacy? Will I be the friend that everyone can call upon for anything? Or will I be the selfish, greedy person that no one wanted to associate with? I need to make some changes in my life, that's for certain! I need to start listing some ideas and start doing them...

Teaching our kids to talk...

We got an email from one of our nieces this morning... she was letting everyone know that yesterday was her 30th birthday and that their new baby is now 6 weeks old. They just can't wait until she (the baby) starts talking... Though I don't know this niece very well and have only met her once, I just had to respond. You can read below the letter I wrote back to her...

***********

Okay, whoa, wait a minute.... If I may interject here.... I used to think that, too. (Can't wait until the kids can talk.)

I remember all the time spent trying to teach them how to talk and react, etc... Then, it all happens at once. K, our oldest, who is 7 going on 17, is usually quite
good. She speaks eloquently and many people forget that they are talking to a child
because she sounds so grown up... could be that we spent so much time and effort trying to teach her how to talk, could be that she's the oldest and automatically assumes that she's the boss. Not real sure...

Then there's B... She will be 6 in May and when you ruffle her feathers, she gets like her Daddy. The hackles raise, her voice gets commanding, and heaven-forbid you actually try to reason with her (read: shut her up before she's done!). But at other times, she's the most lovable verbally and physically.

Let us not forget that there is one more: S. Yes, we thought it would be great
to teach him how to talk so that he would be as smart as his sisters and they would all just get along so well all the time.... Somehow God thought it would be funny to make us wait on that dream. Oh, don't get me wrong... he's very smart. Just in a quiet, sneaky way. He didn't really start talking a whole lot until about a year ago or so.... apparently he has been listening and learning, though. And one of my proudest moments of his accomplishments came this past Saturday as the kids and I were at the beautician. The girls and I needed haircuts badly. Well, S in all his 4 yr. old wisdom decided to talk the gal's ears off as she worked on B's hair. And it was cute at first; he told her that he, too, needed a haircut because he was starting to look like a puppy dog. She said that she could trim up his hair, too, if he wanted.

Then, the truth comes out - "Sometimes I toot. I like to toot on B."

I proceeded to ask him (as my hands are shielding my eyes while I look at the floor) "Who did you learn that from?"

He answers, "B told me. She likes to toot on me too!"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, and I burp in her face!"

Then he continues his conversation with anyone who is willing to listen. I was so proud (not!). All I could think was, "Why did we spend so much time teaching him how to talk? He apparently has learned much of it on his own.
Now we have to teach him how to hush once in a while!"

Is it Spring Yet???

Well, it's been too long since my last post, but I've been busy. Workload is picking up and I had a crazy notion to make Easter dresses for the girls this year. I thought I had picked out a simple pattern, but it was not written well. If it hadn't been for Aunt T's help, I never would have accomplished them. They are a simple jumper style with a little long-sleeve jacket over them. By the time I got them finished, the girls had nearly outgrown them. Oh well!

We had a wonderful Easter, though. I worked in the nursery at church and let me tell you, I am glad our own kids are the ages they are. I do not miss the fussiness because of not being able to talk to let us know what they want. I do not miss the constant need to be held when tired and being fed. Diapers don't bother me, but it's nice to not have that 'diaper pail' smell in the house now! Maybe I'll try the preschool room next time. At least most of them can tell you what is wrong and what to do to make them feel better.

Today I have been fighting a cold that over the course of the day has taken away my voice. I was able to talk on the phone at work from 8-2, but after that, I wasn't doing well. By the time I got home around 3:15, I had no voice whatsoever. Our oldest daughter took it upon herself to see to it that I got some rest and let me take a short nap this afternoon. She appointed herself the "official phone-answerer" and also made sure I had a bottle of water with me at all times. She took care of her brother and sister to keep them in line and read them the bedtime stories. She is such a great daughter... sometimes I don't deserve her.

I emailed my boss at home to let her know that I couldn't talk, so if there were other things I could do instead of answer the phone tomorrow, it would be good. I haven't heard back though. I'll just show up in the morning ready to work and let them know that I can't talk. There's plenty of cleaning and straightening up needing done in the shop and storage areas. Plus I have paperwork to do, as long as I don't have to call anyone to complete it!

I've taken some medecine, but I tell ya', it hurts so badly to cough! I took a decongestant, but that's just causing the crud to drip down my throat, triggering a cough. Lovely. When the kids finally get to sleep, I'll call it a night, too. Except that CSI: Miami starts up again tonight. Maybe I'll fold a few loads of laundry while watching. Lord knows we've got baskets of laundry sittin' around waitin' to be folded!

Fridays Can Be Fun!

Well, I've been sitting here thinking about what to write... This is a way of journaling in cyberspace, a sort of "cheap therapy", if you will. Then it hit me- it's Friday! Fridays are notorious for many things around our place. For one, it's payday!!! That means grocery shopping after school with the girls. It's fun just taking two of them at a time because it's easier to listen to each of them speaking. On many Fridays, we have a light supper then watch videos. If the kids are careful (and the dog is not in the way or being too pesky), we'll pop popcorn, lay blankets out on the floor, and relax while watching those movies. I like to stretch out on the couch, but I usually end up with at least 2 kids fighting over me and the dog trying to root under the blanket to make his "nest". For a pesky, furry, four-legged varmint, he makes a great heating pad! And truth be told, I don't mind the kids taking up all my extra couch space. It's not often we get to cuddle up during the week.

I'm not sure what movie we'll watch tonight. I didn't go to the video store tonight because we didn't have time. But we have enough movies around here to choose from. Nevermind that we've already seen them 20 times. If I find one engaging enough, the kids will stay quiet and maybe even fall asleep on the floor! Ah, the glorious sound of silence! It's times like these that I really wish Hubby didn't work 2nd shift; I feel like he misses out on these special moments. We miss him.

Alpha Blog

Well, I had never thought of blogging and stumbled upon this unexpectedly. I read "Third Times A Charm" regularly, and look through the comments section on his latest entry. One of the people posting I recognized by their screen name and saw that they, too, had a blog. So I followed the link and in order to post a comment on that person's site, I had to create an account. So, here I am.

I chose the name Spellchecker35 because I am anal about things being spelled properly. I admit that I am not perfect in the grammar department, but misspelled words are a pet peeve of mine.

If you read my profile, you saw that I enjoy traveling on mission trips. I hope to post a story about my trip to Honduras that I took part in this past January. I have also been to Cuba and spent time in France. My travels are not nearly as exciting as others around me, but they're mine, nonetheless. Just today, I received a DVD in the mail from someone who also went on the Honduras trip. One of the guys on the trip was a professional photographer and took well over 1,000 pictures and put them on a DVD chronologically. It is so wonderful! It shows the beauty of poverty and riches, all wrapped into one. I can't really describe it yet... but rest assured, when I write about the trip, I'll get out my Thesaurus and figure out how to post pictures on here, too.

Until then, .......